In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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