Pregnant stripper...not hot.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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