hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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