did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
