do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
