I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
