i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
So vagazzling was a success
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
