so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
