That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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