With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
