Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
