No, you can still breathe under the balls.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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