I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
