Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
