just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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