i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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