I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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