she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Randomize
