it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
