When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
