New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Randomize
