She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
