sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
