Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Randomize
