Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
