I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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