Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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