So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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