At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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