Well apparently he's into motor boating.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
you traded sex for a burrito?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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