Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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