i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I have peed in a lot of sinks
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
