He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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