I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
It's blow job season.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
