Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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