Duck Duck Cougar?
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
he thought i was a dude.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Randomize
