I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
