I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
