rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
