Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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