I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
