I'm laying in your front yard are you home
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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