sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
