garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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