Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
