she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
