He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize