hell yes lets make some ravioli
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
