the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Randomize
