Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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